I came down with a crappy cold last week and I reluctantly made the decision to cancel two days of clients.

Boy – did that bring up some shit!!!

I’m being lazy.
I don’t work hard enough.
Just suck it up like everyone else does.
I don’t deserve to be able to take two days off work.
I am not worthy.

Yikes! Can you relate??

I thought I was doing the work around this idea that “busy-ness” = worthiness.
I was calling bullshit on this capitalistic concept.
I totally got it – saying “yes to rest” was the hip thing to do and I was totally doing it!
Until I was forced to rest for real- and I realized I wasn’t so hip after all!

Our capitalist society has programmed us from a VERY young age to believe that being “busy” means we are “productive” and being “productive” means we are “successful” & happy & worthy of love & everyone thinks we are amazing because we are busy busy busy!!!

Yet . . . most of us are walking around sleep deprived and depressed with calendars full of shit we don’t want to be doing – making deals with ourselves . . .

When I cross everything off my list – then I can rest.
When I get that next promotion – then I can rest.
When I finish the 25 loads of laundry – then I can rest.

Well guess what my beautiful friends – the “to do” lists keep on coming, there will always be the “next” promotion and the damn laundry NEVER ends!

SO . . . I wanted to share with you something that has helped me believe . . .
That I am worthy of rest.
That the world won’t fall apart if I take a few tasks off my “to do” list.
That my husband won’t think any less of me if I lose myself in a puzzle and a glass of wine for an hour (when I could be folding that laundry).
That I deserve to take a sick day to heal my body and rest my brain.

“No More Grind: How to Finally Rest with Tricia Hersey” podcast #139 on the “We Can Do Hard Things” Podcast (thank you Glennon, Abby & Amanda)!

“Why grind culture – a collaboration of capitalism and white supremacy – wants to keep us exhausted, and how we can resist a culture of overwhelming busy-ness.”

LISTEN TO IT PLEASE!!!!!

“HOW WE CAN RESIT A CULTURE OF OVERWHELMING BUSY-NESS” Yes please – I’ll take some of that!!

Just try it- let go of some of your “busy-ness” and say yes to rest.
It will probably feel a bit uncomfortable and may even bring up some shit (see beginning of this blog) – but do it anyway!

The world WILL NOT end if you take some time to rest- I promise!

Also – your “rest” may look different than her/his/their “rest” and that’s ok . . . you do you!

Your rest may be a walk in the woods – a phone call with your bestie – cooking your favorite meal – reading a book. Your way of resting is still resting & there are no rules!

I like to rest while keeping my hands a bit active – knitting, puzzling, gardening, drinking wine – and sometimes the occasional power nap sprinkled in.
My husband likes to rest completely horizontal on the couch, covered with a blanket and asleep in less than 5 minutes!

VERY different ways to rest – but it works for us because it feels good to us!

Be true to what feels good to you- because our world needs you – you beautiful, worthy, successful & RESTED human being!

xoxo,
amy

The post Just Take the Damn Nap. appeared first on amy davis life design.

It’s been a minute since I last wrote to you  . . . and I REALLY want to tell you that life is good- full of rainbows, adventures, joy & magical unicorns.

But to be completely TAO (transparent – authentic – open) life has been sucky lately . . . & what I REALLY want to be honest about is that I am in deep with my negative thought patterns and a bit of  “mean girl talk.” Can any of you relate?

It’s not an easy thing to put out there (especially as a recovering perfectionist) but my life is FAR from perfect right now, and it’s a bit cringy to be writing this to you.

BUT . . . I am sensing that there are a lot of us feeling the same way right now . . . and I need you to know . . . you are not alone!

Life is hard.

People are mean.

Our world is burning up.

Winter is coming.

Yikes! Debbie Downer much???

The thing is – I KNOW what I need to do about my negative thoughts and “mean girl talk” – I just don’t know if I have the energy to follow through with it!  -Sigh-

So I am going to keep this short and sweet “ish” because honestly, I really DON’T  have the energy to do the work of shifting my negative thoughts right now – and that’s ok.

See what I did there? By adding the phrase “and that’s ok” I gave myself permission to accept my lack of energy in this moment. I’m tired dammit – it’s been a shitty couple of months and I am just worn out.

That doesn’t mean I will never have the energy to do the work on my “mean girl talk” and negative thought patterns or that I am using it as an excuse to just ignore the suckiness. It just gives me some space to exhale and be ok with where I am right now.

Just by writing this to you, my beautiful friends, I can feel something loosening around my heart (the heart chakra is the center for self love so no wonder it feels tight and stuck – it is NOT a fan of all this mean girl talk)!

Giving yourself permission to be ok with where you are and what you are feeling right NOW is f***ing powerful.  

So now all we need to do is practice!

“I am not being a supportive partner  . . . and that’s ok.”

“I am not taking care of my body as much as I should  . . . and that’s ok.”

“I am not working hard enough as a coach  . . . and that’s ok.”

Yup – these are some of my very real negative thoughts that I am believing are true at the moment.  – sigh – cringe – sigh –  But I am working on them even though I am damn tired – because I know it’s worth the freedom I will feel as these thoughts begin to let go of me.

So much more powerful information I could share with you about “Thought Work” (thank you Byron Katie and Martha Beck.)  If you want to dig deeper and crave support from someone who is right there in it with you – reach out – I’m here for you! I will guide you through your negative thoughts and cheer you on when you stand solidly in your truth! 

For now . . . just notice when a negative thought pops into your beautiful mind (there will be thousands a day) and see if you can just add . .  “and that’s ok” to the end of one of those negative thoughts. And then notice – 

How does your body feel?

How do you react to your circumstances?

How do you behave towards yourself and others?

Just start here and see how it feels – no judging – no comparing – no mean girl talk. 

I will be practicing right along beside you my beautiful friends and remember – you are NOT alone!

As we practice this simple, yet powerful tool  . . . my hope for you (and me) is that our life DOES have a few rainbows, some joyful moments, lots of love for ourselves and maybe even a magical unicorn!

xo,

Amy

The post and that’s ok appeared first on amy davis life design.

It was really good to hear his voice on the other end of the phone.

After packing his car with a garbage bag full of clothes, a tent and sleeping bag, some cans of beans and a whole lotta Ramen . . . my son Sam had been road tripping for the past month.

And now, he was coming home to regroup and hopefully buy a van to “upgrade his road tripping status!”

So when he called to say he was only 20 minutes from home . . . I was a thrilled mama!!

“Oh, and I now have a cat . . .” he says.

Wait, what???

“I found him at a rest stop in North Carolina, shivering, dirty and wet, hiding between two vending machines. He followed me to my car, and when I opened the door . . . he jumped in. I gave him my dinner (a can of tunafish) and then he fell asleep in my lap. What was I supposed to? He had no collar, and no one else was there, and he was soooo skinny and sad!”

So this is my life with Sam.
He is an “Animal Whisperer.”

So far his “pets” haven’t impacted my life too much!

There were the ladybugs – Mimi & Jackson, the various mice in the garage, many spiders in the house, his two gerbils – Jerry Garcia and Frank Zappa, our backyard chickens, his bunny – Charlie and of course our beloved yellow lab – Kate.

But a CAT!?!

You see my beautiful friends, I am SEVERLY allergic to cats . . . like I can’t breathe allergic – and I want to gouge my eyes out because they are so itchy, and my nose is constantly filled with snot, and I sneeze a bazillion times and I just feel damn miserable . . . which translates into – I really really really dislike cats!

So this was happening, and I only had 20 minutes to gather my thoughts and figure out how to proceed.

Shit!!

The minute I saw Sam with this cat . . . I knew he was already part of the family, and I was going to need to find some really really strong allergy meds!

Shit!!

Oh and yes, I am a SUCKER!!
Especially when it comes to my boys.
I have my boundaries and I DO say no – but – this cat was so damn cute and my son was already so in LOVE with Lenin (yup, that’s his name) – what could I do?

Why am I telling you this story my friends?

To remind you that sometimes life doesn’t go as planned (I know, I know . . . after the year we’ve survived we all KNOW this already)!!

BUT what I want you to HEAR – it’s ok (actually necessary) to create those healthy boundaries that feel right for YOU!

So what do my boundaries with “Lenin the Cat” look like?

He is not allowed in my bedroom or office (ok, sometimes he gets to go on a special field trip into my office)!
Sam vacuums and sprays allergy mist frequently to keep the dander and cat hair from invading our home.
Someone always has their eyeballs on Lenin, so my chairs don’t become scratching posts and my plants aren’t his personal litter box!
And these boundaries feel good for me!

I can say YES to “Lenin the Cat” while still maintaining some control over my wellbeing and my home!

BTW: It also helps that Allegra has been a MIRACLE antihistamine! I can actually cuddle with Lenin without almost going into anaphylactic shock!

Yes, I will admit . . . I am falling in love with this cat and I adore watching my son love and care for him (he is getting so good at “adulting”) and I’ve had many proud mama moments!

We can be open to change – let go of certainty – keep an open mind – say yes or no – and STILL maintain our healthy boundaries that keep us –

grounded
strong
and living our truth!

Living our TRUTH . . .

What does that look like for you?

Taking a 20 minute break from your responsibilities to enjoy a walk in the sunshine.
Not answering texts or emails after 7pm.
Saying NO to another commitment that feels like a “should.”
Buying yourself tulips because you are worth it.
Ending a toxic relationship.
Reading a book in the middle of the day
Asking for help with dinner because you are exhausted.
Quitting a job that no longer serves you.
Going to bed early.
The list is endless my friends and I am giving you permission to create those healthy boundaries especially when plans change, uncertainty creeps in, worry and anxiety cloud that beautiful brain of yours . . . or a white cat shows up on your front porch in the arms of your son who is grinning from ear to ear . . . and they BOTH immediately melt your heart.

live your truth
create healthy boundaries
put yourself first
say NO
say YES
be brave
be gentle with yourself
love fiercely

xo,
amy

The post The Day my Son Rescued a Cat! appeared first on amy davis life design.

I never used to be a “napper.”

I thought it a waste of time and definitely judged those who did nap (I’m looking at you my darling husband)!

There was always too much to do and not enough time in the day and the more things I crossed off my list, the better I felt about myself and could prove that I was “enough” that I was “productive” that I “contributed” that I was “worthy.” Who had time for a nap????

Sound familiar??? Exhausting right?? Yup, me too.

But now I nap (honestly, it’s still hard for me to admit that).
I know, that’s a bit fucked up . . . but I’m working on it!

Let me be clear though . . . I still LOVE the hustle!
It makes me feel alive, vital & sparkly!

I ADORE my “to do” lists (I know, I’m weird . . . but I really do)!!
I feel productive and “in control” when I cross something off my list.
It comforts and calms me (especially now when our world is a bit of a “shit show”) knowing that I finished the laundry, cleaned out the chicken coop, called my mom, swept the garage, paid the bills, emailed a client and made dinner.

It gives me a rush and I DO feel productive when I see those checked boxes on my Evernote App . . . and I don’t think this is a bad thing as long as I seek out the balance between hustle and rest.

And to be completely transparent . . . this 50 year old body has seen a lot of life and is beginning to have a few aches & pains, bumps & bruises, twinges and spasms . . . and how long have I had that chin hair?!?

Sigh.

So you see . . . rest is important . . . for all of us.
That’s really all I have to say . . . just take a damn nap once in awhile, or at least “rest your eyes” (like my Grampa Lew used to say).

You can even put “rest”on your to do list so you get to cross it off!! OMG how exciting!

Oh, and another thing, my beautiful, kick ass people . . . you ARE “worthy” and “enough” and “valued” no matter how many things you crossed off your list today, just sayin’.

The post Just Take a Damn Nap. appeared first on amy davis life design.

It’s ok to cry yourself to sleep.

I did the other night.

It caught me by surprise.

I was joking around with my husband about getting a good nights sleep (before his 5 am wake up call to climb a mountain).

I told him I would sing “Kumbaya”  to him (which is a song we sang to our boys every.single.night for years) . . . so I started singing.

I barely made it three words in until the tears came and then the sobs!

I couldn’t seem to stop them.

I didn’t want to keep my husband awake (of course he comforted me because he’s awesome that way) but I also couldn’t stop the damn tears from flowing.

WTF??

Where did they come from?? 

I was just giggling 2 minutes ago and now I couldn’t control the sobs (and control is my middle name)!!

I eventually just gave in, letting the tears roll down my face until I fell asleep (probably snoring) and didn’t wake until morning.

I guess my body just needed to “cry it out” as we used to say to our boys.

So many reasons right now for tears and sobs . . . so damn many . . . yet how often do we attempt to “hold it together” “put on a brave face” “keep your chin up” “push through” and just try to fucking hold on for one more day.

It’s exhausting & unsettling & scary & disconcerting & EXHAUSTING!

So I want to give you permission my beautiful friends to fall – the – fuck – apart.

Be a mess . . . let those tears spill out, embrace your splotchy face and your runny nose.

Cry in the dark. Cry in the light. Cry in your car. Cry at the dinner table.

Be pissed off. Be frustrated. Be scared. Be loud. Be quiet.

And then do this . . .

Drink lots of water (like A LOT).

Get outside every single day.

Go to bed earlier and actually sleep for 7 to 8 hours.

Reach out to your friends & family for some lovin’.

Be gentle with yourself, no really . . . give yourself a break.

Put your damn phone down more often.

Eat a green veggie or two, daily (mine are broccoli and spinach).

Move your body in a way that feels true to you.

Clear off your kitchen counter of the shit that doesn’t belong there.

Treat yourself to fresh flowers and light a candle.

Have sex.

Then a glass of wine.

Then watch a good show (I’m binging on Season 9 of “Call the Midwife” which makes me soooo happy).

And remember to give yourself permission to be a mess, fall apart when you need to and just STOP with all the self judgement . . . it’s enough!

Oh and also  . . . just so you know . . . you are always beautiful to me my friend . . . no matter how messy your life is or how splotchy your face becomes from crying . . . you are beautiful.

xo,
amy

The post It’s OK to Cry Yourself to Sleep. appeared first on amy davis life design.

It’s 3 a.m. and I am WIDE awake.

This doesn’t happen to me very often.

Most nights, I fall asleep very quickly (my husband loves to brag about this fact) and I usually stay asleep until morning.

So WTF . . . 3 a.m. . . . wide awake.

And then the thoughts begin swirling . . .

I hope my mom stays healthy.
How long is this quarantine going to last?
Should Sam go off his ADD meds?
I wonder if we planted the garden too early?
I need to get back to sleep now!
I think I drank too much wine tonight.
Dumb ass.
Ok, take some deep breaths.
Don’t look at the clock.
I really need some lip balm.
Don’t think about your dry lips!
So many people are out of jobs right now.
What will happen if Andrew gets laid off?
Take some more deep breaths.
Am I doing enough for Sam?
Am I doing enough for Jacob?
Am I doing enough for our world?
I feel helpless.
Stop complaining . . . just be grateful.
I need to get back to sleep!

You get the idea.

These thoughts (that were mostly negative) kept me up for about an hour until I was able to acknowledge them, notice how they were making me feel (totally stressed out) and accept them for now (I did get up for lip balm).

This allowed me to take some deep breaths, relax my clenched jaw and slowly fall back asleep.

In the morning I realized I had some work to do! These thoughts that were keeping me up at night needed to be meet with understanding and compassion so they would eventually let go of me (Thank you Byron Katie) and allow me to get those 8 solid hours of sleep that I crave!!

The technique I use to help me with these negative thought patterns I learned and practiced (A LOT) though my Martha Beck Life Coach Training and with my clients. It comes from “The Work” by Byron Katie. It’s simple, powerful and badass.

Yep – just what the world needs right now – and I’m here to help!

So here’s the deal . . .

Thoughts come in and out of our brain constantly throughout our daily lives. We have 60,000 thoughts a day, and 80% of them are negative (holy shit)!

Our brain is hard wired to notice and hold onto negative crap 5 times more effectively than positive stuff. (Yeah, that kind of sucks!)

But I DO have some good news for you . . . YOU HAVE THE POWER to change your negative thought patterns. You will still have a massive amount of negative thoughts filtering through your beautiful mind every day . . . BUT I can help you shift your negative thoughts and how you choose to react to your circumstances . . . so you can kick ass in your life!!

YOUR THOUGHTS ARE PAINFUL . . . NOT YOUR LIFE!! Most of us think we need to change something in our life to “feel” better (do more to help the world, lose 10 pounds, find a better career) but it is simply not true.

You must change your thoughts to live a better life BEFORE you do anything else (like quit your job or stop eating bread).

If you change your actions without changing their cause (your negative thoughts), you are setting yourself up for a shit storm that will continue to swirl around you!

Change your thought patterns first my beautiful people!! . . . and let me help you!

It is not the circumstances of life that bring us down and make us feel like shit (for example, I can’t control when the quarantine will end, or if my mom stays healthy or the stupid shit people post on social media).

BUT I CAN change the way I think about that situation or that person or that post . . . which will most definitely decrease my frustration and stress and worry, Fuck YES!

It almost sounds too good to be true . . . but it’s not . . . I promise!

I’ve studied Byron Katie’s method “The Work” and used this powerful tool with every single one of my clients over the past 10 years (and on myself almost daily). It has changed my life, propelled my clients toward kick ass lives and quite honestly . . . could change our world!

Let me be clear . . . life sucks sometimes and those negative thought patterns will always be there because we are humans! The goal of “The Work” by Byron Katie isn’t to “get rid” of your painful thoughts and limiting beliefs all at once. The goal is to meet your thoughts with understanding and compassion . . . and eventually, your negative and painful thoughts will let go of you.

I’ve added this awesome info to my website – YAY – so check it out!

I would love to guide you to look at your painful thoughts from a different perspective and help you retrain your brain by creating new neural connections & pathways.

Yep . . . that can totally happen and we could all use a few new neural pathways right about now!!

So let’s chat on the phone or through FaceTime or Zoom . . . we’ve got options and this quarantine doesn’t even get in our way!! Hell Yes!!

In the meantime . . . notice the next negative thought that comes into your brain.

Just NOTICE it . . . no judging or “mean girl” talk. You don’t need to feel shitty about it, just notice it and meet it with understanding and a little bit of compassion. Don’t try to fix it or make it go away, just hang with it for awhile and see what happens.

As you begin to understand your negative thought for what it is (just a thought), you begin to take the power away from it . . . giving the power back to you! I am woman hear me roar!!

Let me know how it goes!!!

xo,
amy

Oh . . . I almost forgot to tell you the BEST part! Once you become an expert at “The Work” I will teach you how to use the tool on your own and you can share it with your besties over a glass of wine (they will love you forever)!!

The post Wide Awake at 3 a.m. appeared first on amy davis life design.

I’m in LOVE with my lists! They keep me organized, calm and “in control” (for the most part) – and during this unsettling and scary time in our lives, my lists bring me comfort, feel familiar and keep me sane.

But sometimes I get a bit obsessed with my lists and overwhelmed with the hundreds of items that never seem to go away and just LOVE to follow me around . . . poking at me, taunting me, whispering to me that I am not working hard enough or fast enough or long enough.

When this happens – which is almost every damn day – I look for the next “best thing” (a book, an app, a TED talk) that will help me “stay on track” and “cross off 50 tasks a day without breaking a sweat.” I may search for the perfect journal or datebook or pen that will magically make me more efficient and less overwhelmed with my many many many lists (yep, I’ve got lots of categories).

But I am here to tell you my beautiful people that there is NO magic journal or datebook or pen or phone app or computer program that will take it all away! Your lists will always be by your side for the rest of your amazing life  – so why not make peace with them, invite your lists to sit down at your kitchen table for a cup of tea and perhaps even become friends!!

It CAN happen . . . and here’s how I am doing it!!

First of all, EVERNOTE!!! It’s free (I think) and you can have an app on your phone and your computer . . . and they sync!! It’s amazing!

This is where I have all my categories and sub categories and sub sub categories!! They are called “notebooks” and you can add as many as your heart desires!! It’s a really good place to “brain dump” so all those things swirling around in that big beautiful brain of yours can be put down somewhere, making room for more important stuff like . . . “What will I bake today?” or “What time is happy hour?” or “What episode of Tiger King are we on?”         Ya know . . . super important life stuff!

The other discovery I want to share with you comes from one of my favorite writers and Martha Beck Master Life Coaches Katherine North!  Her writing gives me goosebumps and her spirit is so true, that I knew her book recommendation would be fabulous!!

“The Checklist Book” written by Alexandra Franzen. It’s all you’re gonna need people and it will change your life!!

I’m not going to go into a lot of detail about this book because I am hoping many of you will add it to your reading list  (it’s a super easy read – 171 pages that have lots of pictures, worksheets and large print – I finished it in just a few hours)  AND to be completely transparent . . . I’m keeping this blog short and sweet so I can check it off my list for today!! So here are the highlights . . .

• Alexandra is a great writer using lots of life examples that we can all relate to!
• Super “user friendly” tools and techniques that can be put to good use immediately!
• Her 4 intentions for writing this book: “set realistic goals” “celebrate tiny wins” “reduce stress and overwhelm” “feel calmer every day” . . . doesn’t that sound like something the entire world needs right about now!
• “One Day. One Page. Brevity is key,” Alexandra writes “You want your Daily Checklist to include the most important tasks and moments of your day (which feels good), but without being excessively detailed and lengthy (which feels overwhelming).

For me, Evernote is my “excessively detailed and lengthy” list which is ok with me because I check in with my Evernote list at the end of the day to create my “one day one page” list for the following day to keep that overwhelm at a safe distance!

• “Checkmark, not Strike – Through” Once you have completed a task, use a checkmark instead of drawing a line through the task (this was a HUGE change for me)! “Why? Because it’s important to see AND celebrate your victories throughout the day rather than obliterating them!”
• “Overall Flow, But NOT Rigid” Listen up perfectionists . . . this ones for you!! “Your Daily Checklist shows the overall flow of your day, from the moment you wake up to your final moments of the night. However, it doesn’t need to be rigid, tight and restrictive. This is about setting a clear intention for your day, but it’s NOT about perfection.” Feel free to skip around and be flexible with your list, and it’s ok if you don’t check everything off your list every day!

Let me repeat that one: IT IS OK IF YOU DON’T CHECK EVERYTHING OFF YOUR LIST EVERY DAY!!!

• One of my biggest “aha moments” as I devoured this book was the section about “adding a few easy wins” first thing in the morning to my Checklist. Like . . . making my bed, putting on my workout clothes or making coffee for my Babe. Alexandra explains, “By adding a few easy wins to your checklist, this helps you begin your day on a victorious note. As you check off these first tiny goals, you feel rewarded – thanks to dopamine in your system. You want to keep going. You feel proud of yourself. There’s a feeling of action, aliveness, movement and momentum – things are in motion! Your day has barely begun, and it’s off to a great start!!” YES PLEASE!!
• Alexandra has lots of kick ass templates in her book, downloads and resources that make it SO easy to become the queen of your own “one page one day” list!
• She also has suggestions for all kinds of Checklists for those of us who can’t get enough – “The Loose-End Checklist, Seasonal Checklist, Survival Checklist, The Workout Checklist” . . .
• She explains that no two days in life are exactly the same, and neither are our Checklists. This totally makes sense to me and my lists vary greatly depending on my perkiness, my cycle, the weather, if I’ve had enough water or too much coffee! Alexandra tells us to “update your list daily, setting your intentions and making your plans for the next day. Your plan for tomorrow might be very similar (practically identical) to the one today, or it might not be!”

There are SO MANY more nuggets of wisdom in “The Checklist Book” so check it out NOW!!!!

Alexandra’s concepts have helped me simplify my lists and CELEBRATE the tiny wins that I used to just take for granted or not even “count” as being productive or worthy of a checkmark!! Now I even write down “sex with Andrew” on my list and that’s been a game changer!!

So think about grabbing this book here  – you won’t be disappointed – I promise!!

And please please send photos of your lists to me and Alexandra . . . share the love and the goosebumps!!!

xo,
amy

The post I am in Love with my Lists! appeared first on amy davis life design.

“Rest” is a “four letter” word that I don’t say often (barely ever).

For me, “rest” means to be . . . lazy. . . unproductive . . . useless . . . unworthy . . . incompetent . . . valueless and just plain
NOT GOOD ENOUGH!!!

For me, I measure my self worth on my productivity (sound familiar)???

For me, I LOVE to cross items off my “to do” list and the more items I cross off, the more worthy and valuable and “good enough” I feel.

For me, the more PRODUCTIVE I am the better I feel about myself.

For me, “Rest” just gets in the way!!!

I don’t think this is TOTALLY fucked up. (Though some of you may beg to differ!)

I think it’s ok to feel good when you are productive . . . making those phone calls that have been on your list for weeks, catching up on your emails, crossing off 5 “to do’s” on your work list (I did this today and it felt delightful) or clearing the cupboard under the sink that has taunted you for months.

Being productive is a good thing . . . we all do it . . . we all talk about . . . we all feel happy about it (most of the time).

But what isn’t a good thing (in my humble opinion) is avoiding “rest” and disregarding it as being productive . . . as I have learned the hard way over the past several weeks.

I’ve been struggling with a virus for over a month that has hung on tight and really interrupted my life . . . forcing me to cancel dates with my girlfriends, struggling to keep up with my household responsibilities, rescheduling clients, barely having conversations with my family, canceling my spin classes over and over again and then crawling into bed each night feeling defeated, useless and unworthy . . . which DOES NOT look good on me!!

I’ve been forced to rest, to REALLY rest and it HAS helped me heal, I KNOW that . . . though I still “kicked and screamed” through the entire damn thing.

So I am working on it.

I am not there yet, quite honestly, not even close.

But I am working on accepting “rest” as something that is VERY productive, helping us to thrive as kick ass moms, partners, sisters, friends and human beings!!

And I have decided to put “rest” on my to do list – every single day!

Some days it may look like sipping my coffee on the front porch for 10 minutes instead of gulping it in the car on my way to do a million errands.

Other days it my look like me reading for an hour BEFORE I fold the laundry, empty the dishwasher, email my clients and take the dog for a walk.

I may take a power nap for 20 minutes in the afternoon, or shut down my laptop an hour earlier than I usually do . . . or I may just take 3 deep breaths before I dive into my “to do” list for the day and that’s enough “rest” for now.

Can we try this together? Let’s “pinky promise” that we will all put REST on our to do lists each day and make sure to cross it off!!!

If you need a nudge or accountability – reach out!! I am working hard at this, and I can help you do the same!

So let’s all rest a bit more each day so we can nourish ourselves, kick butt, spread the love and continue to save the world . . . “pinky promise!”

xo,
amy

The post Let’s “Pinky Promise” to Rest! appeared first on amy davis life design.

As the snow begins to melt, the daylight stays around a bit longer, the sunshine peaks out once in awhile and we begin to shed the many layers that have helped us survive the LONG winter in Vermont . . . we get motivated to clear and organize our clothing and homes . . . calling in clarity and springtime sparkle!

I am having a fabulous time rolling up my sleeves and guiding my clients to clear their clothing closets and dressers this month! SO many clothes have been donated to worthy organizations and so much transformation is happening for my clients . . . with lots of joy sparking momentum and change!

I am always incredibly grateful and honored to be a part of this process with my clients and it definitely inspires me to tackle my own “dirty little secrets” in my home (and life)!

YES beautiful people . . . I have a few “dirty little secrets!!”

I have clutter in various parts of my home and hold onto things that no longer “spark joy” or “serve a purpose.” I’m human . . . and sometimes it’s hard to let go of things or when life gets busy, it’s easier just to stuff the clutter into a closet or a drawer or the basement or way down deep inside you . . . and ignore ignore ignore!!!

Well, it’s been hard to ignore my current clutter “sitch” because I can’t even close the damn linen closet door!

You see . . . I am addicted to “throw pillows” and my closet is so overstuffed with them that I can’t pretend anymore that I don’t have a problem!!

I have some shame and embarrassment around this, and watching my clients deal with similar emotions has helped me to FINALLY admit to and tackle this pillow addiction!

Here is how I did it . . . and it wasn’t nearly as painful as I thought it would be!!!

Step One: I made sure I scheduled (in my calendar) an hour to deal with this shit show. It’s not a very big closet and clearing is a huge superpower for me, so I knew I didn’t need more time than that.

Step Two: Early morning spin class gave me lots of energy and put me in a good frame of mind. I was well nourished and hydrated which helped keep my mind clear and focused.

Step Three: I planned to donate the pillows I was letting go of, so I had garage bags nearby and the attitude that others will be SO happy to repurpose my discarded pillows!!

Step Four: I took EVERYTHING out of the closet including sheet sets, blankets, table cloths and the many many many pillows!

Step Five: I organized the items into categories to see how much I had and decided I didn’t need the 6 random pillow cases, the bed sheets that have never been comfortable and the table cloths that had years worth of stains on them. That was the easy part! I even had cute baskets that I used to organize the above items and they fit perfectly into the closet! Things like that make me so happy!

I already felt lighter, calmer and less ashamed!!

Step Six: Tackling the pillows . . . but more importantly . . . exploring WHY I had so many pillows!!!

This is what I realized . . . pillows are cheap and easy to buy when I need a “boost” (especially during the dark days of winter). It’s easy to transform and freshen up your living room or bedroom or basement with new throw pillows and a blanket and did I mention that you can find cheap pillows easily . . . so what is the harm??

The harm is that I don’t ever feel satisfied with my pillow arrangements . . . so I buy more hoping that THIS time will be different! I do this a few times a season, putting the other pillows away hoping they will someday inspire me . . . but they never really do. I feel guilty getting rid of them, because 25 pillows at $19.99 DOES ADD UP (I really hope my husband doesn’t do the math as he reads this)!!

So I “Marie Kondoed” this shit!!

Marie says when you come across items that don’t spark joy for you but you are still having a difficult time letting go of them . . . ask these 4 questions (I recommend saying them out loud . . . your dog won’t judge!):

“Why do I have the specific item in the first place.”

“When did I get it and what meaning did it have for me then?”

“What role does it play in my life now?”

“Has this item already served it’s purpose?”

And yes . . . you can be attached to something as impersonal as throw pillows . . . BEEN THERE/DONE THAT!!!

Don’t ever be ASHAMED at what you are attached to or what you are having a hard time letting go of. Humans feel comfortable and nourished when surrounded by their “stuff” and that’s ok!

What isn’t ok is if your “stuff” makes you feel anxious, heavy, ashamed or unhappy. If it does, then it’s time to get rid of that shit!!!

Focus on what you want to keep . . . those items that feel authentic to the life you want to live and how you want to feel! (And yes, items as insignificant as paperclips can bring you joy . . . I just found “rose gold” paperclips at Target that bring a smile to my face every time I use one!)

So now it’s your turn!! It’s the weekend . . . a perfect time to commit to clearing an area of your home for an hour or two!

IF you are stuck . . . and can’t seem to let go of those items that don’t spark joy and actually make you feel crappy . . . ask these four questions:

“Why do I have the specific item in the first place.”

“When did I get it and what meaning did it have for me then?”

“What role does it play in my life now?”

“Has this item already served it’s purpose?”

IF you STILL find yourself stuck and in need of support, compassion and permission . . . I’M your girl! Reach out to see what we can do together . . . I promise lots of joy sparking momentum and change! Clear with Amy

I am proud to say that I was able to let go of enough pillows to easily close the closet door and it feels AMAZING to see what I have decided to keep!

I will admit that I have new pillows from Target in the back seat of my car at this very moment . . . BUT it wasn’t an impulse buy and quite honestly, I am never going to stop buying decorative pillows. I am just going to start buying them for the right reasons, making sure they spark joy before I walk out of the store!

Why don’t you work on doing the same!!

xo,
amy

The post My Addiction to Pillows and Other Dirty Little Secrets . . . appeared first on amy davis life design.

Ok my beautiful people . . . here’s the deal . . . CHANGE is happening over here!!!

I’ve been “clearing out” my coaching practice and experiencing ginormous internal shifts that are making me squirm uncomfortably but also jump for joy!

I’ve realized that I have been pushing away (for many years) what really gets me excited and dare I say turned on when it comes to my coaching practice.

I have been following the path of what I think “I should” be doing with my life coach training and certification AND my Physical Therapy degree . . . instead of REALLY listening to my gut. I have continued down this smooth road because that was the plan . . . and I have all the binders and notes and books and certifications and a Masters Degree to prove it!

Yet right now . . . my gut is full of butterflies giving my “plan” the finger (I know, butterflies don’t have fingers . . . but just go with it) and whispering to me, “Take the damn leap, shake it up a bit, put yourself out there, be true to your superpowers.”

So I am listening to those whispers, taking that leap . . . and officially stepping out as a Clearing Coach and Organizational Consultant.

I actually don’t even know if that is what I am going to call “myself” or “my work” or whatever . . . labels can be so damn confusing . . . but hopefully you’re picking up what I’m laying down!

I wanted to write this blog to you . . . my supportive and beautiful people AFTER I had organized all of my notes and thoughts about my clearing practice, scoured my “clearing mantras” to get just the right tagline to WOW you with, and reread all 25 of my books on clearing, organizing, creating clutter free spaces and sparking joy . . . because that is easier than putting myself out there with this new “ish” path I am walking down (actually . . . it feels more like I’m skipping)!!

Instead, I just decided to write to you with all of my notes scattered on my desk (gasp . . . I know, not very “organized” of me), my books stacked on the floor beside me, and my thoughts a bit unclear but my excited energy keeping my fingers typing away!

I just wanted to tell you that clearing clutter and organizing is my jam and I am really fucking good at it!

It doesn’t feel like work when I do it (with a client or in my own home), I could do it all day every day and the satisfaction of a clear space is addicting!

Also . . . I have a HUGE girl crush on Marie Kondo!

The thing is . . . I am NOT going to reinvent the “Clearing and Organizing Wheel.” There are SO many amazing experts that I love and have learned from (Marie Kondo, Peter Walsh, Stephanie Vogt, Katherine North, Gail Blanke, my mom)! So much information from different perspectives and philosophies . . .
but the goal is the same . . . to create clear and organized spaces around you so you can enjoy your beautiful life and be a kick ass human being!

What I AM going to do . . . is make these ideas and methods and processes available to YOU through my blogs and social media and clearing practice.

Most of us can’t afford to bring Marie Kondo over from Japan to help us clear our spaces for a week . . . but you can afford me! And just so you know . . . there is plenty of “traditional coaching” going on as I clear with my clients so it’s really a “two for one deal.” (And by the way . . . I can help you clear and organize remotely! Skype is an amazing tool)!

What I’m ALSO going to do . . . is make sure you realize that cleared spaces and an organized home and life (calendar-emails-filing system-schedule) DO NOT happen over night. You are NOT a bad person if you decide to keep more than 30 books (I don’t know how Marie Kondo does that)!! You have not “failed” if you can’t quite give up those “pre baby” pair of jeans that haven’t been worn in 3 years.

I get it . . . we all have our shit (literally and figuratively). BUT letting go of that shit, clearing spaces, living with less crap and chaos around you . . . WILL create clarity and calm and true joy . . . and isn’t that what we all want?!?

Side Note: Just because I am tweaking my coaching practice a bit DOES NOT mean that I haven’t loved every one of my coaching and personal training clients . . . and still do! I’m not going anywhere people! I ADORE my clients and will continue coaching and personal training as long as you need me! So DO NOT fret! I’m here for you girl!

This isn’t a completely new gig for me. Clearing coaching IS on my website and I have worked with several clearing clients (getting goose bumps as I admire all their beautifully cleared spaces and the internal transformation my clients go thorough). (PUT WEBSITE LINK HERE) And have I mentioned the rush I get when I drop off the car load of crap at the donation centers . . . PURE ECSTASY . . . I know, I’m weird!

I haven’t called myself a Clearing Coach and Organizational Consultant because I haven’t given myself permission to take a detour from my plan, because WTF . . . how do I do that??

But as my Goddess Card Aine says . . . “Take a risk, and put your heart’s true desire into action!” So here I am . . . giving myself permission to take a risk, listen to my gut and put my true heart’s desire into action!

Go ahead . . . now you give it a try (even a small risk or leap can be super powerful) and see how it feels!

SO MUCH MORE TO COME . . . but for now . . .

A Clearing Tip from yours truly – Clearing your Bedside Table . . .

Sleep is life and clearing the space around you where you sleep is powerful! Throw away the used tissues, place a decorative bin on the floor to put “away” your motrin bottle, your headphones, hand cream, etc. Clear out the books that you are NEVER going to read and take the 4 water glasses down to the kitchen sink! The only thing you should have on your bedside table is your clock (or phone) one water glass and a lamp! That is truly all you need . . . so get rid of the rest . . . and enjoy a good nights sleep!

Sweet Dreams!

xo,
amy

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