It’s 3 a.m. and I am WIDE awake.
This doesn’t happen to me very often.
Most nights, I fall asleep very quickly (my husband loves to brag about this fact) and I usually stay asleep until morning.
So WTF . . . 3 a.m. . . . wide awake.
And then the thoughts begin swirling . . .
I hope my mom stays healthy.
How long is this quarantine going to last?
Should Sam go off his ADD meds?
I wonder if we planted the garden too early?
I need to get back to sleep now!
I think I drank too much wine tonight.
Ok, take some deep breaths.
Don’t look at the clock.
I really need some lip balm.
Don’t think about your dry lips!
So many people are out of jobs right now.
What will happen if Andrew gets laid off?
Take some more deep breaths.
Am I doing enough for Sam?
Am I doing enough for Jacob?
Am I doing enough for our world?
I feel helpless.
Stop complaining . . . just be grateful.
I need to get back to sleep!
You get the idea.
These thoughts (that were mostly negative) kept me up for about an hour until I was able to acknowledge them, notice how they were making me feel (totally stressed out) and accept them for now (I did get up for lip balm).
This allowed me to take some deep breaths, relax my clenched jaw and slowly fall back asleep.
In the morning I realized I had some work to do! These thoughts that were keeping me up at night needed to be meet with understanding and compassion so they would eventually let go of me (Thank you Byron Katie) and allow me to get those 8 solid hours of sleep that I crave!!
The technique I use to help me with these negative thought patterns I learned and practiced (A LOT) though my Martha Beck Life Coach Training and with my clients. It comes from “The Work” by Byron Katie. It’s simple, powerful and badass.
Yep – just what the world needs right now – and I’m here to help!
So here’s the deal . . .
Thoughts come in and out of our brain constantly throughout our daily lives. We have 60,000 thoughts a day, and 80% of them are negative (holy shit)!
Our brain is hard wired to notice and hold onto negative crap 5 times more effectively than positive stuff. (Yeah, that kind of sucks!)
But I DO have some good news for you . . . YOU HAVE THE POWER to change your negative thought patterns. You will still have a massive amount of negative thoughts filtering through your beautiful mind every day . . . BUT I can help you shift your negative thoughts and how you choose to react to your circumstances . . . so you can kick ass in your life!!
YOUR THOUGHTS ARE PAINFUL . . . NOT YOUR LIFE!! Most of us think we need to change something in our life to “feel” better (do more to help the world, lose 10 pounds, find a better career) but it is simply not true.
You must change your thoughts to live a better life BEFORE you do anything else (like quit your job or stop eating bread).
If you change your actions without changing their cause (your negative thoughts), you are setting yourself up for a shit storm that will continue to swirl around you!
Change your thought patterns first my beautiful people!! . . . and let me help you!
It is not the circumstances of life that bring us down and make us feel like shit (for example, I can’t control when the quarantine will end, or if my mom stays healthy or the stupid shit people post on social media).
BUT I CAN change the way I think about that situation or that person or that post . . . which will most definitely decrease my frustration and stress and worry, Fuck YES!
It almost sounds too good to be true . . . but it’s not . . . I promise!
I’ve studied Byron Katie’s method “The Work” and used this powerful tool with every single one of my clients over the past 10 years (and on myself almost daily). It has changed my life, propelled my clients toward kick ass lives and quite honestly . . . could change our world!
Let me be clear . . . life sucks sometimes and those negative thought patterns will always be there because we are humans! The goal of “The Work” by Byron Katie isn’t to “get rid” of your painful thoughts and limiting beliefs all at once. The goal is to meet your thoughts with understanding and compassion . . . and eventually, your negative and painful thoughts will let go of you.
I’ve added this awesome info to my website – YAY – so check it out!
I would love to guide you to look at your painful thoughts from a different perspective and help you retrain your brain by creating new neural connections & pathways.
Yep . . . that can totally happen and we could all use a few new neural pathways right about now!!
So let’s chat on the phone or through FaceTime or Zoom . . . we’ve got options and this quarantine doesn’t even get in our way!! Hell Yes!!
In the meantime . . . notice the next negative thought that comes into your brain.
Just NOTICE it . . . no judging or “mean girl” talk. You don’t need to feel shitty about it, just notice it and meet it with understanding and a little bit of compassion. Don’t try to fix it or make it go away, just hang with it for awhile and see what happens.
As you begin to understand your negative thought for what it is (just a thought), you begin to take the power away from it . . . giving the power back to you! I am woman hear me roar!!
Let me know how it goes!!!
Oh . . . I almost forgot to tell you the BEST part! Once you become an expert at “The Work” I will teach you how to use the tool on your own and you can share it with your besties over a glass of wine (they will love you forever)!!