The pies are made, the car is packed, our dog is at her favorite kennel and we are on our way to visit family for Thanksgiving.
As we begin our 5 hour drive (with my 15 year son at the wheel . . . yikes) I am reminding myself of a few quick strategies to make it through the next 48 hours with the family.
Let’s face it, as much as we want our holidays to be like that “Norman Rockwell” painting . . . smiling faces, well behaved in laws, witty and mild banter and warm fuzzy feelings all around, it never is . . . and that’s ok! Family visits usually never live up to the expectations that our minds dream up, so how can we survive these visits and even ENJOY the time we spend with the family? Here are 3 of my favorite survival strategies . . .
1. I keep my mouth shut. Ok, maybe not ALL the time, but I try really hard to stay in my own business and out of everyone else’s! Staying out of someone else’s business is damn difficult for me and it usually never ends well. So the best way for me to stay in MY business is to just keep my mouth shut (except for that witty and mild banter)!
2. I put my wine glass down. I won’t deny it . . . I love my red wine and it’s always flowing at our family gatherings. It’s easy to use it to take the edge off and get me through those uncomfortable family moments. But it’s never a good idea to rely on it . . . and the more wine I drink, the harder it is for me to keep my mouth shut . . . shit . . . now I’m in everyone’s business!
3. I write myself a permission slip. Which means, I give myself permission to acknowledge and FEEL my feelings. I’m not always proud of the emotions that are coming up (especially during family gatherings) and I don’t necessarily want those shitty feelings hanging around for too long. But the LESS I ignore them or try to stuff them down, the shorter their visit! When I write myself a permission slip and allow my feelings of frustration or disappointment or resentment to flow through, I can usually get through to the other side pretty quickly . . . and reset and enjoy the rest of my family time. Cheers!
My hope is that at least one of these strategies will work for you . . . but if not, just remember . . . the holidays DO NOT last forever thank goodness!
xo,
amy
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