“Selfish” is not a dirty word.

I work hard every single day
as a mom . wife . life coach . writer . volunteer . friend . . .

I work damn hard.
And I am good at what I do.

I am also good at taking time for me.

Some may call this selfish . . . let them.
I love that word, and in my opinion,
we all need a little more selfishness in our lives!

The definition my handy dictionary app came up with for selfish:

adj – concerned chiefly or only with yourself and your advantage to the exclusion of others

is somewhat misleading and negative.

Here is MY way more positive, clear and beautiful definition of selfish:

Being good to yourself.
Taking time for you.
Making yourself top priority.
Embracing who you are.
Being your own biggest fan.
Believing in yourself.
Showing up to your life.
Buying yourself a new pair of shoes dammit!

Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about!

I love my life.
I am blessed.
I am not lucky, I am present.
I set my intentions.
I show up in my life.
I make it happen.
And . . . I am selfish.

This is what my selfish looks like:

I find time to exercise . . . this is a big one!
I love to meet my friends for coffee or lunch . . . my favorite.
I treat myself to a haircut, a manicure, a facial . . . and I feel good!
I say goodnight to my boys early, so I can climb into bed with my fav book.
I shop for beautiful things to add to my home or my wardrobe . . . a lot!
I treat myself to a green smoothie at my favorite health food store . . . sooo delish.

Sounds nice, huh?
But I won’t lie to you . . . there is a catch.
And my hunch is that many of you can relate.

Sometimes I have a lot of guilt around . . . being selfish!!!

Even though I did 15 loads of laundry, went to the market twice, worked with 2 clients, signed 5 permission slips, chauffeured my kids to their activities for 3 hours, paid the bills, walked the dog, cooked dinner, AND managed to find time to workout and shop for new couch pillows . . . guilt still grabs me, catches me off guard and hisses, “What do you mean you took time for yourself to workout and shop for pillows?”

Guilt finds a way in.
It creeps into my thoughts.
Wraps itself around me until I feel stuck.
Whispers in my ear, “Who do you think you are?” “Why are you so selfish?” “It’s not about you, it’s about your kids, your husband, your job, your commitments, your duties!”

I don’t like guilt
It’s needy
It’s ugly
It’s controlling

And most of the time, I kick guilt to the curb.
But sometimes, it gets the best of me.
And that’s ok.

I say hello.
I acknowledge his presence.
And then I turn around and walk the other way, done.

Guilt loves to make selfish feel dirty.
He wants you to think selfish is a “four letter” word.
Damn him!

But that doesn’t mean you can’t kick guilt to the curb.
Be a bit selfish every now and then.
It’s all good . . . I promise!

The thing is . . .
being selfish makes me a kick ass
mom . wife . life coach . friend

It gives me a chance to exhale and reset reset reset.
It sends me juicy love and clarity.
I feel crazy good and bounce around with green smoothie energy.
I conquer those damn mountains, or at least the mountain of laundry.
I am just plain ready. Bring it!

You can be kick ass too!

You just need to find your “selfish.”
What does it look like?

When you choose to be “selfish”
You will kick butt.
You will look smokin’.
You will rock this world.
You will live on the edge.
You will be totally true to you.

You DESERVE some selfishness in your life. Try it today.

AND

Repeat after me . . .

“Selfish” is NOT a dirty word!